Nothin' like an old Joe Cocker song to send me tripping down memory lane.
He originally got the song from Paul Weller.
"Seems I've got to have a change of scene
'Cause every night I have the strangest dream
Imprisoned by the way things used to be
Left here on my own or so it seems
I've got to get out before I start to scream
'Cause someone's locked the door and took the key
You feeling alright?
I'm not feeling too good myself
Well boy, you sure took me for one big ride
And even now I sit and wonder why
An' then I think of you and I start to cry
But I just can't waste my time and must keep dry
Gotta stop believing in all your lies
'Cause there's too much to do before I die
Don't get too lost in all I say
Though at the time I really felt that way
But that was then and now it's today
Oh - can't get out feeling, so I'm here to stay
Til someone comes along to take my place
With a different name, just a different face
You feeling alright?
I'm not feeling too good myself"
Don't worry, I've got the lyrics in the blog (at http://multiplesclerosisblog.blogspot.com/ ) but I'm not going to sing along.
I've never had a singing voice.
It's not false modesty either.
I just don't have a singing voice.
Maybe that's why I became a good instrumentalist.
I couldn't fake it by humming along.
---- Tin Hearts
Anyway, feedback should come first, so...
I promised "Have myelin?" from Colorado, that I would do something on an iPod for her, despite her deafness, which you must admit pretty much defeats the purpose having an iPod.
(Well, it would if it wasn't for her cochlear implants. She has the "potential" for much better hearing than us "mere mortals".)
But it was an interesting gedanken experiment.
Firstly, it has to be a G5 or better iPod, otherwise an iPod is less useful to the hearing impared than the equivalent volume of chewing gum.
Secondly, the usage is completely wrong.
She will have to stop whatever she is doing in order to focus on the iPod instead of partitioning and multi-tasking and lettting the audio fall to the background while her eyes help her to navigate.
Thirdly, it would require the development of software (and the installation of said software) for her iPod.which would:
- enable the opening of a PDF file,
- viewing a PDF file, (with a slider, cursor mechanism,) with an 'auto advance' mechanism (sort of a karaoke machine but over an entire screen,)
- closing so as to terminate the PDF file viewer.
Then again, there is something kind of "yeech" about it regardless of how I attempt to compensate over a medium that's the wrong bandwidth.
Eyes take in so much more information than ears but they require so much more attention.
I was thinking of mis-using the m4a file format to accomplish this (complete with chapters) and having an accompanying audio track, which she would not hear, (well, that she wouldn't hear properly.)
Basically, I would have to abuse the format in the exact sensory obverse from Violet Blue's Open Source Sex. (Yes, there are those kinds of podcasts too.)
Instead, I've written to Apple with all the hints they need to do it so we' d be able to tie in a 'chapter' to a dictionary of text files (one per langage,) and get them to add subtitling (or closed captioning,) properly.
Eventually, the "frozen music" image will be the text and illustrations on "Ludwig Mies van der Rohe" from "The Oral History of Modern Architecture" ISBN: 0-8109-3669-0, while the audio will be my usual tomfoolery.
---- Clockwork Family
I've been blogging a lot more. The list of other bloggers on my site has been growing and I owe a by thank you to mdmhvonpa for providing an extentive list to start with. I am starting a whole series of wiki pages, one per MSer I encounter.
I heard some sad news today, Friday October 6th, 2006.
Mdmhvonpa sent word through his website http://www.mdmhvonpa.blogspot.com/ that a fellow MSer, mouse at http://insimpleterms.blogspot.com/ , has lost a spouse.
Its kind of a double tragedy when an MSer loses not only the love of their life but someone she could always depend on to help.
Leave her a message of condoleance and encouragement at:
---- Twisted Family Ties
Medicare restrictions on mobility devices are scheduled to take effect November 15, 2006.
Yes, your elected officials just don't get it. That because it not representative. There are no handicapped people, no sick people, no disabled people in any part of our legislative bodies... This sucks...
Beginning Monday, October 2 through November 8, members of Congress will be in their home districts for the electoral recess. While your legislators are back at the fount, call or visit their local offices!
We've got to stop the Medicare policy that restricts device coverage and restricts mobility.
People with multiple sclerosis and other disabilities will lose mobility under a new Medicare power mobility device policy.
Coverage will be restricted to certain devices, limiting people with MS to lower-quality, poorly-performing mobility devices. And against their physicians' recommendations.
People with MS need mobility devices that meet their level of function and allow them the greatest possible quality of life. This is not be what you might be entitled to.
Basically, if you don't speak up, you're going to get shafted.
---- A Question of Family
I'm going to end this podast with the song "Reinstalling Windows" by Graham Holland. This is going out specially for Michelle, a cute biking MSer from Alaska who blog I've just read. (It http://icensnow.blogspot.com/ , is on the show notes folks.)
One of her earlier posts got me thinking about the stages of grief:
- DENIAL --- What's the first thing you do? You try to start it again! And again. You may check to make sure the radio, heater, lights, etc. are off and then..., try again.
- ANGER --- "%$@^##& car!", "I should have junked you years ago." Did you slam your hand on the steering wheel? I have. "I should just leave you out in the rain and let you rust."
- BARGAINING --- (realizing that you're going to be late for work)..., "Oh please car, if you will just start one more time I promise I'll buy you a brand new battery, get a tune up, new tires, belts and hoses, and keep you in perfect working condition.
- DEPRESSION --- "Oh God, what am I going to do. I'm going to be late for work. I give up. My job is at risk and I don't really care any more. What's the use".
- ACCEPTANCE --- "Ok. It's dead. Guess I had better call the Auto Club or find another way to work. Time to get on with my day; I'll deal with this later."
I guess I was on a fast track to acceptance since I went directly from denial to acceptance (Yeah, I walk with a cane now, shit!) but there is a big difference between acceptance and accomodation.
While I accept that I now have some limitations, I'm not laying down and weeping. I refuse to go gently into that long goodnight.
I will have to continually learn to work around my limitations to find some way of accomplishing my goals.
If way one doesn't work, I've got to come up with another, better way.
Economically, its simple supply and demand: because I've got a smaller supply of me I've got to be far more efficient in my use of me in order to accomplish my goals (Do I sound like a recent college graduate in business. That's because I am. :-)
In effect, I have to become a better much better capitalist than the average person because getting this disease has raised my ambitions while simultanously lowering my physical capital.
---- Reinstalling Windows