msb-0092 Uh, I won... Holy crap I won!

msb-0092 Uh, I won... Holy crap ... I won!

Feedback comes first so...

Thank you Miss Chris for your sentiments on the last episode: "msb-0091 Serious Sirius Christmas Fantasy". (Go to the blog and read the comments if you want to know. But, yah! I am da man! :-)

Brain Cheese seems to be under the weather, as does Friday's Child, or at least her partner, so go over and drop them a note of encouragement.

MDMHvonPA will shortly be regaling us with his roundup of the blog-o-sphere.

I gotta tell ya, it takes me a long time to record those because I'm always cracking up at some point or other.

The expressions and "tour de phrase" he uses are priceless. Sometimes I'm trying to read his stuff for the tenth time, and I'm still guffawing.

----

Onto other news:

The "Your big break! Be a Sirius DJ For a Day - For Charity" contest didn't quite turn out the way my life usually does.

Uh, I won... I won! I won? :-)

I'm still waiting on Mark Yashimoto Nemcoff to get in touch with me regarding the money (My credit card paymentwon't go through? Should I send a cheque?)

I'm also hoping to get an MP3 that I can actually use from "Don Lafontaine" (The man who's done all those "In a world where ..." movie, tv shows, tv ads (Geico is the most memorable one,) and radio promos. [ http://www.donlafontaine.com/ ] :-)

"In a world where disability strikes 10 per cent of the population,
only one man has the guts to take on the powers that be,
and raise his voice in a challenge to media demagoguery
and the tyranny of the mass market.

That man is Charles Rovira and he can be heard at MSBPodcast.com."

That would be "sweet". (I'm also dying to find out what is that mike is that he uses [the picture is on his site] :-)

But I'm going to "Be a Sirius DJ For a Day" this January. Yay!

Sirius have about 6 million listeners.

After doing some math, like who's listening at specifically that time, I figure that works out to maybe 50 MSers who might catch the show, maybe. Maybe I'll be able to pick some of those up.

(Then again, who knows if there might be some potential advertisers listening.)

We'll see if I actually reach some new MSers with this show.

Woo, hoo...

----

I'm also commissioning a cartoon figure of "Ixy" walking around with a red cane.

"Ixy" will be my stand-in. Complete with my red cane.

I figure it's got to be more appealing, representing us coping with MS, than "Larry the Lesion" representing the disease of MS. (Google for "Larry the Lesion" and you'll get to "Mandatory Rest Period" [http://www.todmaffin.com/blogs/ms/], Tod and Kim Maffin's more medically oriented MS web site and podcast.)

Tod and Kim Maffin tread where I don't want to go. Mostly because I'm am "not" qualified.

What I "am" qualified to do for us MSers is to listen to any and all of us and to put out some entertaining shows, while opening the door to information we do need.

----

Here are some facts about me:

My IQ is in the 150s (Sure, sure. So why do I feel so stoo-pud. :-)

My cholesterol is in the 160s.

My weight is in the 170s.

My height is a meter, 80. (okay, okay. I may be, uh, stretch-ing, it a bit. :-)

And my health, in general, is excellent.

Apart from the sclera affecting my motion, I'm in the absolute pink of health.

So why do I live with a constant, nagging sense of dread?

Why do I keep expecting to hear the other shoe drop?

Its part and parcel of being a realist, I guess.

I always remember that "In to every life a little rain must fall" and, just like buying mutual funds where "past performance is no indication of the future", I have been hit by a shit load of, uh, shit loads.

But that doesn't mean that I'm suddenly due for a turn around.

Life doesn't work that way.

Only Goofie, down at the entrance to "Disney World", sings "Oh, the world owes me a living..." and only a two dimensional cartoon character could possibly believe it.

Lets look at the economics of the situation with a sense of social as well as fiscal responsibility.

According to the W.H.O., the World Health Organization, 10% of the world is disabled. (http://www.who.int/nmh/a5817/en/) (I'm quoting some real world facts so you don't think I'm just pulling numbers of of my ass.)

That's about 600 million people, six hun-dred mill-ion people, of all ages, sexes, races and cultures. (That's twice the population of these United States.)

Right now, we're ignoring that ten percent of the world, for their consumption, and still paying out ginormous sums in health care, which is:

• health insurance, (companies which make sure that they don't pay out because that impacts on their bottom line,) and
• health care providers (also companies which make sure that they don't pay out in drugs and services, because that impacts on their bottom line.)

Meanwhile we, the health care users, are getting the short end of the stick because we're immediately suspected of malingering, and then, to add insult to injury, we are prevented from contributing except as guinea pigs.

That is so stupid, short sighted and wasteful (and I hate wastefulness. I regard it as a personal offense to my sense of parsimony.)

To combat this attitude, I am running this podcast.

It can be a boon for the drug companies and the other paraphernelia and service companies.

But, it can be an even bigger boon to us MSers. We can find out what is out there for us.

----

I went into a kind of denial after my recoveries from my two first episodes...

I lived in blissful ignorance of MS for almost 15 years after my first undiagnosed episode, and then for another 15 years until I had a third relapse and had to learn to cope with walking with a cane, and by then denial was "not" an option.

And the mass media was an unwitting co-conspirator in my eventual disability.

There were no media outlets for information about the disease and the treatments that could have abated it.

It was "far" too easy for me to bury my head in the sand.

If there had been a show like this, one where I could tune into and they weren't depressing my ass off with jargon and terminology, I might have taken better care, appropriate care, and I might have prevented my having to use a cane to "schlep" around, slowly.

What made me attractive to my employers over the years, my brains and my ability to use them, are now hampered by what has happened to my body, and to my central nervous system.
(And once you fall off the radar ... well, you've fallen off the radar, haven't you.)

But I'm no less intelligent (and neither are all the other MSers I've encountered in the blog-o-sphere.)

But human beings rather waste what doesn't fit in, wouldn't we, rather than just "listen" to any ideas from those who no longer fit in.

Well this is "that" show, and hopefully the first of many, where the square pegs start, not just moaning and groaning, bitching and whining but start to contribute to the wider discussion about what can be done about us (beyond Hitler's "final solution",) with us and for us.

10% of this country is not making it and 5% of this country can only make it part of the way, part of the time, because the rest of us, the 85% of this country that are not currently disabled, are not asking what we 10%ers, and what we MSers, 'can' contribute.

We have brains and we have experience and we are 'not' being consulted.

We are rarely seen and we are treated like shit because this country has never known what the Hell to do with anybody who is 'other.'

Yes, we are 'other.'

Stop being scared of our differences.

We aren't Martians.

We won't come down from outer space to molest your cattle.

We aren't a drag on the economy, unless your economy isn't being 'realistic'.

This show is about injecting a little reality into all our lives.

And I'm not going to sit here and preach to the choir.

I'm trying to use the internet and this podcast to promote some efficiency into the commercial reality of our existence.

That's what winning this promo spot means to me.

I have a model, and like all models, it being honed and refined through what I experience.

Its a model of communications in the internet age, far from the tyranny of the numbers; the concept of "the hit show" being shoved down our thoats, when its just a reduction of a whole bunch of focus groups.

Its a way for MSers to take their place and their opportunity to get the information we need out here.

msb-0091 Serious Sirius Christmas Promotion

msb-0091 Serious Sirius Christmas Promotion

vvvv Not in the show vvvv

If you've been listening to Pacific Coast Hellway, you'll no doubt have heard my name, or a reasonable facsimile thereof, "Chuck the Canuk," mentioned on the show concerning my high bid for his charity auction.

This episode is a fantasy piece, because somebody's bound to bid more that I did, but, in the meantime, I've gotten all that free advertising. :-)

Who knows, with millions of listeners, that may translate to a listener or two who might enter the URL in their browser and subscribe to the show.

And to be honest, this is being done for the advertisers ears more than its being done for our ears.

^^^^ Not in the show ^^^^

Welcome to a very special edition of the MSB Podcast. For a moment, we're stars in a portion of the Sirius firmament. (That constellation, "Canis Major," just happens to be one of Orion's hunting dogs. ... Son of a Bitch ...)

Many thanks to Mark Yasimoto Nemcoff and the Pacific Coast Hellway for having run this promotion for the David Foster Foundation (The links are all on the show notes at MSBPodcast.com Or, if you're listening using iTunes, this is an mp4 so they're 'clickable'.)

This episode will be divided into two segments:

• one twenty-four minutes long for the audience who are listening on Sirius Starz 102,
• two for the spill over which will be on the normal podcast at MSBPodcast.com
  

So what's this podcast about?

First and foremost, its about putting some podsafe tunes out there, usually picked around a theme, that people can enjoy. This episode, its all about Christmas.

I'm not a doctor, I'm an MSer. I don't talk about MS. I leave that up to the pros. I talk about how its affecting my life, my perception of life and things related to disabilities in general.

(And if you're driving home right now, watch out where you're going, or you could end up in a different kind of car crash than MSers did, or stepping in front of a bus, or something; so watch your ass.)

Second, it's about providing a specific niche channel for advertisers, the makers of products, goods and providers of services, that people who have this disease need to know about.

I've even got an advertising model that keep me out of their faces by giving a separate show per ad, and keep them out of my face.

Third, its a chance for me to have some fun with all of you, though that sometimes involves me bitching and ranting about things. (Mark Yashimoto Nemcoff definitely does not exclusively own that privilege.)

Lets start this off with a rocking tune: "Not So Silent Night" by "Charlie Crowe"

---- Not So Silent Night by Charlie Crowe

The gummint is an endless source of stories for me.

Between one thing and another they always fascinate with their endless opportunities for fuck-ups, fuck-overs, and general systemantic laws and flaws ( http://generalsystemantics.com/SystemsBible.htm ).

Systemantics color my perception of the entire world.

Its about systems displaying antics, also called systems opposing their own function, or known as semantic anomalies, as described by Alfred Korzybski (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfred_Korzybski .)

Like, why did Egypt build the Aswan dam?

To control the annual flooding of the Nile and produce electricity.

And it certainly does that... But!...

So what happened?

Well, in stopping the flooding of the Nile, they found that the soil around it in the delta was becoming very poor.

What did they expect? Its only sand. Silicon dioxide. Useless to carbon based life forms.

The annual flood was the source of nutrients that the plants could use.

So that now they need to make fertilizers, which just happens to use up more electricity than the entire damn dam produces.

The net effect of the Aswan dam is a negative.

The Egyptians would have been better off finding some other way of coping with the annual flooding of the Nile; like moving out of the freakin' flood plain and building some levees way the fuck out. (Something that would've helped with Katrina too.)

But not to worry...

The dam, and lake Nasser behind it, is silting up.

The turbines are choking on muck, which may very well dispose of the problem by rendering them useless.

This will eventually make for a swell movie featuring the Aswan damn dam being blown to Hell and back.

Other examples are:

"Health care," which should properly be called "health don't care". Living with it as I do, I know what it really is. And its not pretty.

"Life insurance," which doesn't insure that you'll have one. Just that if you stop breathing before they stop your coverage, (and believe me they work out the odds so that they'll stop your coverage just in time,) your survivors get a consolation prize.

"Disability Insurance" which requires an extremely un-disabled, rugged constitution and almost super human stamina to jump through all the hoops, loops to make it over and past the kooks, to even apply for (and if you really need it, you can't even contemplate doing it.)

Thr really fun part are the tests that they require. By the time they approve the last one, the results from the first are too dated. And meanwhile, you're doing this entirely with out any income.

(Remember, its disability insurance. You can't work. And if you can't work, you'd better have some money put away to live on; which will screw you on the "means" testing; which means that if you can somehow scape enough to live through the entire process, you obviously don't need it. Been there, done that. Fuck 'em all where they breathe. They're moils who use their teeth to circumcise you.)

And so on...

Lets give a listen to something festive: "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" by "Chris B."

---- God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen by Chris B.

As long as I've got the Sirius listeners here, there's something I need to get off of my chest.

It really chaps my ass that subway riders that won't move over to give me the seat nearest the exit doors.

I don't know which is more stupefying, being stared at right in the face by some gum chewing, fat cows' bovine eyes or when these people pretend that I'm invisible.

I've got a cane and its painted red for Christ's sake.

Stand the fuck up. You can afford to lose they weight.

I can't afford to break a hip tripping over the parcels you leave at your feet, in the aisle. (But I have used those parcels as a landing cushion.

"Merry Christmas chil'. Sorry but some cripple fell over an' sat on your dolly's head." :-)

And don't put your fuckin' face down in your paper.

Do you really, suddenly need to look at it as much as you usually stare into your handkerchief, like it was a book of revelations.

Fer Christ' sake, its only "The Post". I'm sure Rupert Murdoch won't mind this once.

Instead, I have to teeter my way to eventually park my ass in the middle of the bench of seats and find some way to turn around and get my heiny down without falling over.

That when there even is a free seat in the middle.

The reason the handicapped need the fuckin' seat is so that we can actually maneuver our asses down while hanging onto the damn pole. And getting up is as much of a bitch too.

Fuck, Al Qaida should feel real safe.

We'll never see a fuckin' terrorist with a knapsack filled with explosives on the subway because we don't look at anybody.

Any more than we look at each other in the elevator.

And to make sure that you're listening to me here's: "Do you hear what I hear" by "Dusty Hughes"

---- Do You Hear What I Hear by Dusty Hughes

But we don't have it all bad.

MS may be an auto-immune disease,
which causes scarring on the myelin sheath around our nerves,
which gives us a noisy nervous system,
but if you play your nerves right
and ride the razors' edge between too little sensation and too much,
modulating the noise, as it were,
the amount thereof can be used to cause absolutely mind blowing,
toe curling,
crawl out of your skin,
stop-the-world-this-is-my-stop,
cascades of orgasms.

You think you know sex?
You don't know diddly.

My sex life is indescribably ... Well words just fail me.

But trust me. I pity you... :-)

So lets listen to: "Just Stockings On'" by "Munk"

---- Just Stockings On by Munk

Again many thanks to Mark Yasimoto Nemcoff and the Pacific Coast Hellway for having run this promotion for the David Foster Foundation.

Say Goodbye Sirius listeners. You're probably never hear from me again, unless you tune into MSBPodcast.com .

Oh! Since, according to the World Health Organization, you're nine time more likely to be healthy than not, next time you park in a disabled parking spot, remember that my cane has a nasty spike on the end of it that is perfect for puncturing the side walls on your tires.

If you're not helping, then stay the fuck out of our way.

---- 24 Minutes are over

Okay gang.

I just want to wish
that you have, or had
(these shows are evergreen so they can be downloaded for simply yonks,)
a Merry Christmas,
or a Happy Hanukah,
or a Happy Kwanza,
or whatever,
and a Happy New Year.

I look forward to being with you, and hopefully, though tragically, with more of you in the coming year.

That's it for this episode..